Until Next Time

My daughter returned from her Transplant Game adventure last night. The hours counting up to when she would walk through the door moved slower than I ever could have imagined. I had an endless list of questions: How was the flight? Did she make friends? Did she take all of her meds? Did she drink enough water?  Did she get tired? What was her favorite part? What did I miss that was not posted on Facebook? What were her best moments? What didn't go well?

Finally, though, the moment came. I opened the front door to call in my other children, when at that same moment Jackie walked in with her father. I screamed, then hugged her. It was the longest we have been away from each other -or so it seemed. I knew she had a long day, so I tried not to bombard her with questions.

If you've been following my Angel Donor Page or my Facebook Page, you probably caught a few of my constant updates. The basic rundown is that she competed in Track and Field, Basketball and Bowling. She and her team did very well working together and she brought home a gold and a silver medal.

As we talked about her experiences I noticed something I hadn't seen in her in a while. She was glowing with happiness. Not just because of her accomplishments, but because of her experiences. She made close, lifelong friends in only a matter of five days. She saw first hand how much not only organ recipients, but also organ donors care about donation. She saw celebrities such as Scott MacIntyre support something that means so much to so many people.

She learned many things over these days about the process of organ donation and why it is important to be a donor. We had the talk that I always knew we would have...the same talk the main character Olivia has with her nurse in Angel Donor: "Why did my donor have to die so I could live?" Before I knew it we were discussing brain death and how the transplant team and surgeons care for donated organs.

She also saw examples and heard many stories of how donor families met with recipients. These events inspired her to write a note of thanks to her donor family. Although the family is anonymous to us right now, we can still send a letter of thanks through the Gift of Life foundation who will deliver the letter to protect the donor family's privacy. Somehow life had come full circle. Just 8 years ago I had written a letter of thanks as a parent for the gift of life. Now, Jackie is writing her own letter of thanks.

Over the hours that Jackie has been home, I have also observed the new people in her life. As mentioned before, she has formed friendships that will probably last forever. The friends she made during the games are people who have been through similar situations and are dealing with similar emotions: happiness, survivor's guilt, gratitude and sadness. It is quite a mix, but as I am seeing now, it is what real friendship bonds are made of.  She has already connected with the kids via her social networks, phone and e-mail.

Though the event only lasted five days, it caused a wonderful transformation. My daughter grew up a little bit, but it also helped her understand more about herself and what she has been through. Most importantly though, she learned that she is not alone. As she told me just this evening, "It's like living in another dimension where everyone gets you...right away. They just get you."

And so, now that these games are over, we look ahead to next time in two years. I have made a personal vow to myself during these days. I plan to train myself for a marathon via the Cto5K so that we can do the games together. I've got two years to train, but have the best motivation in the world.

The Transplant Games: More Than Just Sports

As I write, Houston is in the middle of hosting the 2014 Transplant Games of America. This exciting event runs from July 11-July 15, 2014. The games is a "multi-sport event for individuals who have undergone life-saving transplant surgeries." It is open to both organ recipients and living donors. It is not just a sporting event, but also an event to help raise awareness of the importance and need of organ donation.

This is an exciting event for many participants because, like how we worried about my daughter, family members often wonder if that life-saving surgery will ever happen. You try hard not to lose hope, but as the days tick away and your family member gets more sick, you begin to get more worried. Many do get the surgery they need, but too many do not.Just this year a special friend in my community lost his life waiting for a much needed organ.  For those who are lucky enough to receive an organ, it is miraculous to participate in an event such as the Transplant Games. For my daughter, she missed many normal "kid events" when she was sick. A doctor once shook his head as he was giving her an IV and said, "These kids should be out on the playground. Not in here." And now, thanks to my daughter's donor, she is participating in the biggest playground event in her life. This is what organ donation does.

The games happen every two years, and this is the first for my daughter. We don't know who her donor was due to privacy concerns, but nevertheless, she is running in that person's honor. For if that person's family never made the decision to donate, my daughter may not be here either. As she runs, so does part of her donor.

If you are in the Houston area and are looking for something to do, try checking out this event and go support the athletes and their cause. You will be glad you did. Good luck and have fun to everyone participating this year. Enjoy the events. Enjoy Life. Spread the word.

Memory

This weekend I found out a dear friend in our church community died. He was waiting for a heart transplant, but did not get his heart in time. The shortage of organs is very real and the effect of that shortage can hit anywhere or anyone. 

Who was this person? He was a father, grandfather, friend, family, parishioner, a leader, an umpire, and a CTK softball General Manager. When he umped games, he taught children about the game. He was brave enough to get behind the batters in the batting cage-catchers learning their position often missed catching the ball and the balls hit his ankles instead. He will always be remembered for all he did and who he was. 

MEMORY

He loved the young kids,

It showed on his face,

He smiled through games,

He taught kids with grace.

He gave kids a sport,

Everyone could go play,

"Have fun! Play Nice!"

And all'd be okay.

He taught and he umped,

For me and for you.

All so our kids

Had a fun thing to do.

"Softball" and "Quinn"

Were names all as one.

No one could top

Everything he'd done.

Where ever you'd go,

Where ever you'd stay,

You'd hear the name Quinn

And think "C.T.K."

So off now to Heaven,

Our dear John Quinn,

May that ballfield be greater

Than the one you began in.

--With much love,

Jennifer Gladen and Family 

Tabitha's Wish

Today I have a special treat for you. The other night I spoke with Mr. Duncan McLindon of Tabitha's Wish. Tabitha's Wish is a special community page on Facebook. But it's not just any community page. It's a page aimed to make a difference.

Tabitha's Wish

When I asked Duncan, Tabitha's father, what Tabitha's Wish was, he told me a very touching story. Tabitha wanted to open a checking account at the small age of twelve. In order to do that, she had to have an ID card. So, her mother took her to the Department of Motor Vehicles and helped her get a non driving ID. A routine part of the process was for the clerk to ask if the person getting the ID wanted to be an organ donor and have that on their card. Without hesitation, Tabitha said yes. Only one thing confused her. She heard someone next to her say no. On her way home, she asked her mother why the man said no.

We don't really know why the man said no, but it could be due to the myths and rumors often spread about organ donation. 

If everyone who is eligible to donate their organs donates, there would not be a list."

~~Duncan McLindon 

Just one week later, Tabitha was rushed to the hospital. One minute she was enjoying a skating party with her friends, the next she was fighting for her life. After diagnosing her with a rare brain bleed, her doctors did everything they could to care for her. Finally, they told the family that there was nothing else they could do to save her and within days she passed away. Since Tabitha had never been  seriously sick before, she was eligible to be an organ donor. When Tabitha's family was asked if Tabitha could donate her organs, the family knew, without hesitation, what Tabitha's wish was. There was no question. Tabitha's wish was to be an organ donor. And her wish saved the lives of seven people. Tabitha's Wish is all about getting Tabitha's story out there, spreading the word about organ donation and helping tell the story of organ donation from the donor's side.  To read more about her story, please visit and like the page: Tabitha's Wish

Remembering Tabitha

Tabitha's father Duncan told me with enthusiasm when I asked who Tabitha was. What were her likes an dislikes? One thing I learned was she loved horses and was great with them. She was a "natural rider."

"She won her first Saddle at 5 years old," Duncan said with pride. She was a child who loved to learn, but also loved Taylor Swift's music. She got good grades and was on the honor roll. She even won a music award in her short life.

Almost 1 year to the day of Tabitha's death, Duncan McLindon started Tabitha's Wish to spread the word about the importance of organ donation and talking to your family members about your decision. He began doing radio and television interviews.Now, Tabitha's Wish on Facebook has over 11,000 followers. Not only is Tabitha living on through the seven people her organs went to, but now thousands of people know about this heroic child. 

The Interview

During the interview with Duncan, I got to ask some questions and learn all about this family and his sincere love of his precious daughter. After talking about this heartwarming story, I had some other questions for Duncan.

Me: What would you say to some who says they don't want to be a donor because they are afraid their own doctors won't take good care of them in order to harvest organs?

Duncan McLindon: A doctor is sworn to do everything to save the life of their patient. Also very few people who die are eligible to donate organs. If you are in an accident and are fatally wounded, the EMTs will work to save you no matter what. They are not part of the Transplant Team.  Also, if you die while the EMTs are working on you, and you have Organ Donor on your ID, the EMTS will continue their life saving efforts (because the organs need the oxygen). With this happening, there's even a small chance of a miracle on the way to the hospital. However, if you are not an organ donor, all life saving efforts stop as soon as death is declared. 

Me: Have you ever been allowed to communicate with any of the families Tabitha helped? As a parent of a child who received a liver, I think about her donor every day. I owe her donor everything. Since we haven't been blessed with thanking them personally, we often pray for the family and the donor.

Duncan M: I've met the little girl who received Tabitha's liver. (Editor's note: See Tabitha's Wish for more stories and pictures of these meetings.)

There is also a story about the person who received Tabitha's lungs.When I asked her what she wanted to do after she got a transplant, she said, "I think I'll dance." 

Me: Why do you think it is important to spread the word about Organ Donation? 

Duncan M: It is important to get the word out so potential donors won't miss the opportunity of saving a life out of grief. Often, when someone close to us passes, we are overwhelmed. And if we never have discussed organ donation, it is likely we will say no out of our grief. Also, once you decide to be an organ donor, it is important to let your family know your wish. Even if you have an Organ Donor card or it is on your ID, if your family says no, the doctors won't do it. Also, if everyone who is eligible to donate their organs donates, there would not be a list.

Me: What do you think Tabitha would say about the success of Tabitha's Wish?

Duncan M:  I think she'd say, "Thank you for making my wish come true."

Common Myths About Organ Donation

While there are some extraordinary and uncommon experiences out there, the truth is organ donation is a life saving option when the unthinkable happens. According to facts from the Donate Life Pa website, while about 85% of Pennsylvanians support organ donation, only about 45% are registered. Why? After viewing different conversations on social networking sites, I think alot has to do with myths about organ donation.

#1 -  One of the biggest myths and ethical concerns I see is that people are afraid their lives won't be saved by their own doctors if they are registered organ donors or if they agree to donate their organs. 

Fact : The  medical staff whose job it is to save your life is compeltely separate from the transplant teams. It is not until after death is declared that organ donation is considered and a transplant team is notified of an available organ.

#2 - It is unethical to donate an organ.
Fact: Organ Donation is an acceptable process for most religions. Here is a list of major religions and their position on organ donation found at Donate Life PA's website.

#3 - My organ is going to someone who did not take care of themselves.

Fact: - Most transplant candidates are on the transplant list due to severe diseases through no fault of the patient. In the low instances of drug abuse or alcoholism, the patient must be sober for at least five months before even being added to the transplant list.

There are several other myths about organ donation. Please take a look at Gife of Life Donor Program.